Behind Blue Eyes
by USCutie15
Summary: Emily and JJ finally start dating, but why does JJ seem so afraid and nervous about certain things? Will Emily be able to break through those walls? Will she learn JJ's reasons for being afraid? WARNING: Fem-slash and child abuse.
1. Chapter 1

"Morgan, you won't believe this." Emily said, excitement in her voice.

Morgan looked up from the file he was looking at and looked questioningly at Emily.

"What?" He asked.

"She said yes." Emily said smiling.

"What? Who said yes and to what exactly did this person say yes to?" Morgan asked completely oblivious to what Emily was trying to say.

"JJ. She agreed to go out on a date with me." Emily said grinning from ear to ear.

"What? You asked JJ out on a date?" Morgan asked her in disbelief.

"Shhh! Keep it down." Emily said, motioning with her hand for him to keep it down. After all, they were still in the BAU.

"Okay, okay. Sorry. When is the date?" Morgan asked, now, also grinning from ear to ear. He was happy that his partner had finally asked the blonde profiler out on a date.

It was clear for the whole team that they were in love with each other, they were just too scared to admit it to themselves and each other.

"It's tonight. I am so nervous, Derek. What if I mess this up? What if I say something wrong. What if I-" Emily was cut off mid-sentence by Morgan.

"I've never seen you this nervous, princess." Morgan said chuckling.

It was true. Emily was usually this composed person who almost never showed her emotions. But when the subject was JJ, that normally composed person would totally break out into a nervous wreck.

"Shut up, and help me Morgan." Emily said glaring at him.

Morgan chuckled.

"Alright, alright. Just be yourself. Act like you normally do. After all, she fell in love with the person you are." He said.

"Fell in love? How do you know she's in love with me? Just because she said yes to me after I asked her out, doesn't mean that she's in love with me." Emily said.

"Oh please, Emily. Don't tell me you don't see it. Pff, and you call yourself a profiler." Morgan said, shaking his head.

"See what? What are you talking about?" Emily asked, completely oblivious to what Morgan was talking about.

"She's totally in love with you and you're totally in love with her. The whole team knows it." Morgan stated.

"The whole team? How does the team know?" Emily asked, her mouth slightly open in shock.

"You do know you work with profilers, right? I mean the looks you two share are hard to miss." Morgan said smiling.

"Oh God." Was all Emily could say.

"Don't worry, they won't say anything, if anything, they'll be happy for you two.

"I hope so." Emily said.

"I know so. Don't worry." Derek said.

"Alright, I'll try. Look, I got to get going. I still need to take a shower and get ready." Emily said.

"Alright. And just remember to be yourself, just the way you always been. Talk to her the way you've been talking to her since you met her." Morgan advised.

"Alright, thanks Morgan. I'll talk to you later." Emily said.

"Alright, call or text me after, and tell me how it went, okay?" Morgan asked.

"Sure. Bye." Emily said.

"Bye." Morgan said with a smile.

And with that, Emily left the building to head over to her condo.

A few minutes later, Morgan saw JJ leave too, and he smiled to himself.

 _'They haven't even gone out yet and I'm already dying to know the details of this date.'_ Morgan thought to himself as he chuckled.


	2. Chapter 2

Emily arrived at JJ's door right on time. It was 7 sharp.

She took a deep breath and knocked on her door.

She was dressed in black pants and a blood-red shirt.

JJ opened the door and smiled at Emily.

 _'God, she's so beautiful.'_ Emily thought as she looked at JJ.

"Come on in, Em. I'll just get my purse and we'll be right out." JJ said.

"Okay. Hey JJ?" Emily said.

"Yeah?" JJ asked as she looked at Emily.

"You look beautiful." Emily concluded with a smile.

JJ smiled back at her.

"Thanks, you don't look so bad yourself." JJ said with a wink.

JJ was dressed in blue jeans with a button-up baby blue shirt.

Emily smiled as JJ left to go get her purse.

"Alright. Ready." JJ stated as she came back with her purse.

"Alright, let's go." Emily said as they headed out.

JJ locked the door behind herself and they got into Emily's car.

While they were driving, Emily started to talk.

"I didn't think you'd say yes, you know?" She said.

JJ looked at her. "Seriously?"

"Yeah, I was so nervous." Emily admitted.

"I'd been waiting for you to ask. But I didn't think you would, I mean, I didn't think you would want to go out with somebody like me." JJ admitted.

Emily looked at her in disbelief.

"Are you kidding me? Of course I would. Don't sell yourself short, JJ. I mean, you're beautiful, have a great personality. I don't want to ever hear you say that again, please JJ. I've been waiting to ask you ever since the day I met you in Hotch's office, but I didn't think you swung that way, but after I knew and you told me that you did a couple years ago, then I started to think about it and now here we are." Emily said.

JJ chuckled. "Yeah, I've waited so long for you to ask those words, but I didn't think you'd want to. And I didn't ask you because I thought, well if she didn't sk you already then she doesn't want to go out with you and then I just shot that dream down until now." JJ said.

"And here we are." Emily said with a smile.

"And here we are." JJ repeated with a smile in return.

The drive went on for a few more minutes.

When they got there, Emily parked the car and grabbed her things as JJ did the same.

"Alright, here we are." Emily said with a smile.

"Emily?" JJ asked.

"Yeah?" Emily said as she stopped what she was doing to look at JJ.

"I'm glad you asked." JJ said with a smile.

"I'm glad I asked too." Emily said with a chuckle.

They smiled at each other before they got out of the car.

After they had locked the car and had everything, they headed inside the restaurant.


	3. Chapter 3

"The food here is great, Em." JJ said with a smile.

Emily smiled back.

"Yeah, I've been here a couple of times before and I thought you'd like it." She said.

Emily had decided on this small casual Italian restaurant. It was perfect. Not too fancy but not too casual either. It was just perfect.

"I do. It's perfect." JJ said with another one of her signature smile.

"I'm glad you like it JJ. I was scared I'd get it wrong and maybe you wouldn't like it or something." Emily admitted.

"Okay, you have to stop second guessing yourself on everything." JJ said looking at Emily.

"I know. I'm just so scared that you won't want to go out with me anymore. I've waited so many years for this day and I don't want anything to happen that might make you leave." Emily said.

"Em, I've waited years for this day too. I'm not just going to leave because something went wrong. This date is going great, it couldn't go better. It's perfect." JJ assured.

Emily smiled.

"You have no idea how much pressure your words just took off of me." Emily said with a small laugh.

JJ chuckled.

"There's no reason for you to be so nervous. Just be yourself. Act just like you've been acting up until now. Just be yourself. Talk, laugh, be sarcastic, do what you've been doing all these years." JJ said with a smile.

Emily smiled.

"Alright, let's finish eating and then we can go for a drive downtown. And maybe we'll park the car and walk a little. Are you okay with that?" Emily asked.

"Yeah, that sounds great." JJ said smiling.

"Alright." Emily smiled.

They continued to eat, talking about this and that.

When they were done, Emily signaled the waiter for the bill, and much to JJ's protest, Emily paid it and they got up to leave.

"You didn't have to do that, I could have paid half of it." JJ said, talking about the bill.

"Relax Jay. I got it. I asked you out so it's only fair that I pay the bill. It's nothing Jayje, just relax, will you?" Emily said with a chuckle.

"Fine, but next time, it's on me." JJ said.

Emily looked at her as they walked out of the restaurant.

"So there will be a next time?" Emily asked.

JJ suddenly got nervous.

"Yeah, well I mean if you want to, but if you don't want to that's fine too, I mean it's your choice, you don't have to-" She was cut off by Emily.

"Breathe JJ, just breathe. Of course I want to, I was just not sure if you wanted to." Emily said.

"Of course I want to." JJ said with a smile.

She still looked a little nervous about something, but Emily couldn't tell what.

They walked until they reached the car. They had left it few blocks away from the restaurant.

Emily went to the passenger side and opened the door for JJ.

JJ smiled and as she was going to get in, Emily stopped her.

JJ looked at her and Emily noticed she was getting nervous again, so she advanced slowly.

She reached her hand out to tuck a strand of blonde hair behind JJ's ear.

"You know, I didn't think this date would go as great as it did." Emily admitted.

"It was perfect, Em. And you were yourself, you know, you were the person that I fell in love with. You didn't try to be somebody else. And I love that." JJ said with a smile, but still nervous.

Emily closed the gap between them and kissed JJ's lips softly.

The kiss only lasted a few seconds. Emily pulled away and smiled at JJ.

"Come on, get in." She said with a smile.

JJ smiled at her and got in the car.

Emily went around and got in too.

When Emily shut the door, JJ admitted something.

"I've never been kissed like that before." She said.

Emily looked at her.

"What do you mean 'like that'?" Emily asked confused.

JJ looked down at her feet.

"So gently, with so much, I don't know, love, passion, care." JJ said.

Emily looked at her disbelievingly.

"What? No one ever kissed like that?" Emily asked, still shocked.

JJ just shook her head and looked at Emily with tears in her eyes.

Emily turned in her seat so she was facing JJ, as she took her hands in her own.

"Hey, I promise you that if you want, there'll be more where that came from. And I promise they'll always have love, passion, care and gentleness in them. I promise. I don't know how someone could not kiss you the way that I just did, but I promise I always will. I love you and that's all there is to it. Love." Emily said.

"I love you too, and gosh I am so glad I found you." JJ said with a watery smile.

Emily leaned forward and caught her lips again with the same gentleness and love as before.

"Ready?" Emily asked with a smile.

JJ smiled and nodded as Emily started the car.


	4. Chapter 4

After they had driven downtown, they walked a few blocks just making small talk.

"Do you want me to drop you home or do you want to come over to my place?" Emily asked.

JJ looked even more nervous then before.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Emily finally asked.

"What will we do?" JJ blurted out suddenly.

"I don't know, maybe watch a movie or have a drin-" Emily stopped herself mid sentence when she realized something.

"We won't do anything you don't want to do, JJ." She said, immediately assuring JJ that that would not happen as soon as she realized what JJ was so nervous about.

JJ turned her head to look at her.

"I-It's not that I don't want to, I just can't. I can't." JJ said, as she started to ramble nervously.

"Okay. Hey, it's alright, that's not why I invited you over." Emily said.

"I-I'm sorry." JJ said looking down.

"JJ, look at me, please." Emily said as she waited for JJ to look up at her.

As soon as JJ did, Emily was quick to assure.

"You don't have to apologize for anything, it's okay. We can watch a movie, how does that sound?" Emily asked, trying to change the subject.

JJ would talk to her when she was ready.

JJ just nodded.

They walked back to the car and got in.

Emily started the car and they took off, heading to Emily's place.

The ride was silent and JJ looked upset, but Emily didn't want to pry so she just kept quiet.

Finally, they arrived at Emily's and got out of the car.

Emily unlocked and opened the door as they both headed inside.

They set their stuff on the coffee table as Emily turned to JJ.

"Let me just get some more comfortable clothes for us to change into and I'll be right back." JJ nodded.

Emily was fast getting the clothes. She let JJ borrow some sweats and a T-shirt and got some for herself. She got back and they changed into them.

"I'll go make some popcorn, you can pick a movie, you know where they are." She said.

JJ wouldn't look at her, she just kept her eyes downcast as she nodded and went to pick out a movie.

Emily sighed but started walking towards the kitchen to make some popcorn.

As she was putting the popcorn in the microwave, she started thinking about JJ as questions rose to her mind.

'Why is she so upset?'

'Why did she seem so nervous about coming over to my place?'

'Has she ever slept with someone before?'

'If not, is that why she's so nervous and upset?'

All these questions were racing through her mind as the microwave signaled that the popcorn was done.

She shook her head as she put the popcorn into a bowl and headed towards the living room.

When she got there, JJ was sitting on the couch with her head in her hands.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked as she sat beside her.

JJ shot up straight and that's when Emily noticed that she'd been crying.

"JJ were you crying? Are you okay? What's wrong, Jay? Please talk to me." Emily said all in one breath, getting really worried.

"Nothing, let's just watch the movie, okay? Don't worry I'm fine." JJ said wiping her eyes.

"You're not fine, Jayje. You've been crying." Emily said, stating the obvious.

"Just leave it, Em. Please." JJ said in a quiet voice.

"Okay." Emily said. But it didn't mean she would stop worrying.

Something was wrong with JJ, but she refused to profile her.

'Whenever she's ready she will tell you.' Emily mentally said to herself.

JJ clicked the play button on the TV and the movie started.

JJ took a seat right next to Emily, and Emily couldn't help herself but put her arm around JJ.

Emily smiled when she felt JJ cuddle into her as she hugged her close to herself, promising herself that she would find a way to get JJ to trust her enough to tell her what was wrong.

It might not be today or tomorrow, but she would prove to JJ that she could trust her no matter what.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Big thanks to everyone who reviewed :)**

 **BTW Thanks Kensi1997 for saying that I have good writing skills :)**

* * *

When the movie was over, Emily looked at JJ and saw that she was peacefully asleep.

She turned off the TV and looked unsure of what to do.

Scratch that, she knew exactly what to do. She decided that she would carry JJ to her room, let her sleep on her bed and she would spend the night on the couch.

She's slept on the couch many times before and it's quite comfortable.

She preferred the couch rather than JJ waking up and noticing that she was in Emily's bed with Emily sleeping right beside her and freak out or something.

She was definitely going to play on the safe side.

She maneuvered herself just enough to get up without waking JJ.

She then proceeded to pick her up bridal style and took her into the room.

She pulled the covers back as best as she could, considering that she still had JJ in her arms, and laid her down.

As she was laying JJ down, JJ woke up and pushed Emily as far away from her as possible.

"Stop!" JJ screamed as she pushed her.

Emily stumbled, not expecting JJ's reaction but didn't fall.

She then turned on the light.

"JJ! JJ, it's me, honey." Emily assured.

JJ still looked around the room with what could only be described as fear in her eyes.

"JJ! Look at me." Emily said as she walked slowly and carefully to the bed.

JJ slowly focused her eyes on her.

"Em?" JJ asked unsure.

"That's right, I'm right here, there's nobody else here but me. I promise." Emily assured.

"I'm sorry." JJ said, as the tears gathered in her eyes.

She tried to forcefully stop them from running down her face, but that mission was just impossible.

"It's okay, baby. You're okay." Emily said as she gently put her arms around JJ and hugged her tight.

"You're okay." Emily whispered as she rubbed soothing circles on JJ's back.

She hated to see JJ cry. It hurt her heart so much when she saw JJ in pain.

When JJ calmed down enough, Emily tried to explain what she was doing so that JJ wouldn't think other things.

"JJ, you fell asleep on the couch when we were watching the movie. I brought you here because I figured you would be more comfortable. I was going to sleep on the couch, I swear." Emily said, explaining.

"Em, it's not that. It's not you." JJ said.

"What is it, Jay?" Emily asked as she looked into JJ's eyes.

She could see pain and fear, but she just didn't know from what. What was this pain and fear about? For the sake of her she just couldn't figure it out without profiling, and she swore she wouldn't do that.

"I-I can't Em. One day I'll tell you, just not yet, okay?" JJ said, still looking into Emily's eyes.

"Okay." Emily accepted. She reached forward and kissed JJ's lips softly before getting up and starting to head out of the room.

"Em?" JJ called out.

Emily looked back.

"Yeah, Jayje?" She asked.

"Could you maybe-Could you-uh..." JJ didn't know how to ask what she wanted to ask.

"What is it JJ? You can ask me anything." Emily assured.

"Could you maybe...stay with me tonight?" JJ asked as she looked at her hands waiting to hear a no.

"Are you sure you're comfortable with that?" Emily asked unsure.

JJ just nodded.

"Then of course I can stay." Emily said with a smile as she turned off the light and got into bed next to JJ.

"Thanks, Em." JJ whispered as she scooted closer to Emily.

"For what?" Emily asked as she put her arms around JJ, holding her close.

"For everything. You're just being so good to me and I'm not giving anything in return-" She was cut off by Emily.

"JJ, listen to me very carefully. I don't want anything in return. I'm content with just this. Just holding you in my arms, being able to say I love you without fearing your response. This is all that I need, JJ. Nothing more, okay?" Emily said, trying to clear things up.

Emily felt JJ nod in response to her little speech.

"Get some sleep. Goodnight, JJ. I love you." Emily said.

JJ put her arm over Emily's stomach and put her head on Emily's chest.

"I love you too." She said with a smile.

And that's how they fell asleep, just content to be in each other's arms.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: thank you so much Kensi1997 you're awesome :P And I love Jemily too :)

Emily woke up and looked at her alarm clock.

6:30.

She felt someone stir in her arms and looked to her side just in time to see baby blue eyes looking up at her.

"Good morning, baby." Emily said as she bent her neck enough to kiss JJ's lips.

JJ let out a sort of silent chuckle.

"What?" Emily asked.

"Nothing." JJ said shaking her head.

"Come on tell me." Emily said with a smile.

"That sounded good coming from you." JJ said.

"What are you talking about?" Emily asked still smiling.

"The 'good morning baby' sentence sounded good. It had a ring to it." JJ said with a smile.

"Well, as long as you want to, that sentence will continue to come out everyday. Baby." Emily added with a smile.

JJ chuckled.

"Alright, what do you want for breakfast?" Emily asked.

"What do you normally eat?" JJ asked.

"Eggs and bacon, what about you?" Emily asked.

"Same." JJ said.

"So, eggs and bacon?" Emily asked with a smile.

"Eggs and bacon." JJ replied with a smile, matching Emily's.

"Alrighty then, I'll go start making breakfast." Emily said starting to get out of bed.

JJ pulled her back down and kissed her. This time it lasted a little more then the other kisses they have had before.

When they pulled apart, they looked into each other's eyes.

"What was that for?" Emily asked.

JJ shrugged. "For being patient and understanding." She said with a small smile.

Emily smiled.

"You'll never have to thank me for that. Now I'm going to get breakfast done." Emily said, this time successfully getting out of bed.

"Wait, I'l come with you to help out." JJ said as she got out of bed.

They headed out to the kitchen and started making breakfast together.

"JJ, you can go shower, I got this." Emily said.

"Are you sure? I can help out with the rest if you want." JJ said.

"I'm sure. I can handle it. Go on." Emily assured.

"Alright, I'll be quick." JJ said as she headed off to shower.

By the time JJ was done, Emily had already finished breakfast.

"Right on time." Emily said as she spotted JJ.

JJ smiled as they sat down to eat.

They ate in silence, except for a light conversation here and there.

"Alright. I'm going to go shower real quick and then we can go to work." Emily said as they finished putting the dishes in the sink.

"Okay." JJ said.

When Emily went to the bathroom, JJ started washing the plates.

When Emily came into the kitchen she didn't see JJ, but she saw that the dishes were all washed.

She shook her head as she called out.

"JJ?"

"Right here, Em." JJ said, coming from the living room, her gun on her hip and ready to go.

"You didn't have to do that." Emily said.

"Do what?" JJ asked, honestly confused.

"The dishes." Emily stated.

"Oh please, it's the least I could do." JJ said, brushing it off.

Emily shook her head.

"Alright, I'll just get my gun and we can head out." Emily said.

"Alright." JJ said.

As Emily finished putting her gun on her belt and getting everything she needed, they headed out to the car so they could go to work.


	7. Chapter 7

When they arrived, they were immediately met by a super-hyper Garcia.

"Congratulations! Congratulations! I'm so happy for you! I mean like finally!" She rambled.

"Garcia, how much coffee have you had already?" JJ asked with a smile.

"Why do you have to be so mean?" Garcia asked JJ, pretending to be offended.

JJ just laughed.

"Let's go talk in my office." Garcia said as she started to drag JJ and Emily down to her office.

Once they were there, Garcia shut the door and let out a yelp of excitement.

"So, is it official yet? Are you girlfriend and girlfriend?" Garcia asked, excitement fulfilling her voice.

"Well, I don't know yet." Emily looking at JJ.

"Don't look at me, I haven't been asked yet." JJ said with a smirk.

Emily chuckled.

"Oh so that's how you want to play it?" She asked with a smile.

JJ just shrugged, the smirk still on her face.

Garcia was just standing there, looking at both women, still waiting for an answer.

"Alright then." Emily said as she took JJ's hand in her own and looked her straight in the eyes.

"Jennifer Jareau. Would you like to be my girlfriend?" Emily asked with a smirk.

JJ chuckled. "Of course." She replied.

They must have totally forgot that Garcia was there because Emily kissed JJ.

Garcia cleared her throat.

"Alright, okay, that's enough. I'm still here, you know?" Garcia said.

JJ and Emily pulled apart and started laughing.

"Sorry, Garcia." They said at the same time.

Garcia smiled mischievously as she remembered something from earlier.

"I see you two arrived in the same car." Garcia said, trying to look innocent.

"Don't you dare go there, Garcia." Emily warned.

"Did you fluffy pumpkins end up inspecting a little more then just crime scenes?" Garcia asked as she looked at them with an innocent smile.

"Garcia, shut it. Seriously." Emily said as she and JJ rolled their eyes.

"Or did you-"

"Garcia!" Emily and JJ shouted at the same time.

Garcia just laughed as she lifted up her hands in defense.

"Okay! Okay! I'll shut up. But not for long you fluffy love birds." Garcia said as she reopened the door.

JJ and Emily rolled their eyes as they left Garcia's office.

"Talk to you later!" Garcia shouted after them.

"Yeah, yeah!" They said dismissively.

"Why do you have to hurt me?" Garcia asked as she pretended to be hurt.

They looked back with a smile and Garcia chuckled as she shut the door to her office.

She was definitely calling her chocolate thunder God.

This is need to know information and he should most definitely know.

She picked up her cell-phone as she clicked on speed-dial.

"This is Derek Morgan." The voice on the other line said.

"Derek, it's me. You need to come down to my office. You will not believe this." She said excitingly into the phone.

"Garcia, I have to finish doing some paperwork-"

"It's about our two love birds." Garcia said.

"I'll be right down." Derek said, once he heard who it was about.

He closed the file he was working on and immediately went down to Garcia's office.

He opened the door and smiled as he saw Garcia grinning.

He knew she had information.


	8. Chapter 8

Emily and JJ made their way over to the desks, but only saw Reid sitting there.

"Where's Morgan?" Emily asked him.

"I think he went to Garcia's office. She called him for something." Reid said as he continued to read the file he had in front of him.

Emily and JJ looked at each other and rolled their eyes simultaneously. They both knew exactly what Garcia called Morgan about.

Just then, Hotch and Rossi came out from their offices.

"Conference room, everybody, now." Hotch called out at the same time Morgan made his way to his desk.

Everyone looked at each other, but wasted no time in getting to the conference room.

Hotch was standing as they all took a seat except him.

"I received a file this morning. It was sent from local police here in Virginia." Hotch said as he clicked the button on the control he had in his hand.

Normally, JJ would preset and receive the cases, but this time it was different. This time the case file was sent directly to him and he was the one presenting the case.

"We have a serial killer on the loose. This killer targets blonde blue eyed women between the ages of 25 and 30. He kidnaps them, rapes them and then disposes of them." Hotch said as the photos of the victims appeared on the screen.

Emily shuddered as she realized that JJ fit the victim's profile perfectly. She was 28 with blonde hair and blue eyes.

"We don't have a lot of information to go on, so we will have to visit the crime scenes ourselves. We will drive there. Cars leave in 10 minutes." Hotch said concluding the presentation.

They all stood up to leave.

"JJ, Emily, congratulations." Hotch said as Rossi nodded and smiled.

"Yeah congratulations." Rossi repeated.

"For what?" They asked simultaneously.

"For being together." Rossi said as Hotch smiled.

JJ and Emly immediately looked at Morgan accusingly.

"Don't look at me! I swear I didn't say anything!" Morgan defended himself.

Emily and JJ turned back to Rossi and Hotch questioningly.

"We're profiler's. Just remember that." Hotch said, as they all left the room, leaving just Emily and JJ dumbfounded.

"Come on let's go, before we miss the ride." Emily said shaking her head.

"Yeah, let's go." JJ said as she followed Emily.

There was something off about JJ, but Emily didn't know what it was yet.

They grabbed their go bags and went to where the rest of the team was.

"Everybody's here, right?" Hotch asked and they all nodded.

"Okay, let's get going then." Rossi said.

"We have three cars, so Emily and JJ will take one, Reid and Morgan will take another one and Rossi and I will take the last one, everybody good with that?" Hotch asked.

They all nodded and started walking to their assigned cars.

When JJ and Emily got into theirs, they immediately let out a sigh of relief.

"Thank God they're letting us stay together." Emily said.

JJ nodded and smiled a little, but Emily could tell it was forced.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked.

"Yeah. Fine." Was all JJ said as she looked out the window.

Emily just sighed and started the car.

When the silence was becoming too much, Emily took a quick glance at JJ and saw that she was still looking out the window.

"You're going to have to open up to me, JJ. Because something is eating you up inside ever since we went out, so what's wrong?" Emily asked.

"Nothing, Emily. Why do you have to be so insistent?" JJ shot at her.

"Why do you have to put up all these damn walls and lot let me in?" Emily shot back.

"Because if I tell you then you'll probably just tell me to go to hell and that it's over and I can't lose you." JJ half shouted.

"JJ, honey, nothing you tell me is going to make me leave you. Just tell me what's wrong." Emily said, calming down a little.

"I can't, Em. I'm sorry but I can't. Not yet anyway. Not when I just got you." JJ said, whispering the last part, as she turned away to look out the window again.

Emily sighed and shook her head. Whatever it was, it was bad. She just had to figure out a way to get JJ to open up to her.


	9. Chapter 9

Each of them had an assignment and they did just that as they looked for clues to build a profile for this creep.

By the end of the day, they were all exhausted and wanted nothing more than to get some rest.

"Alright. They didn't have enough rooms so each room is going to be for two people. Emily and JJ will stay in one, Morgan and Reid in another and Rossi and I will stay in another. Get some rest everybody, we'll rejoin in the morning at 7." Hotch said as he handed the room keys out.

They all left to go to their rooms. Emily put the key card in and opened the door, letting JJ in before herself.

JJ looked around the room and not surprisingly, there was only one bed.

She shook her head and smiled.

"Looks like you have to stay with me, again." JJ said, putting emphases on the word 'again'.

Emily smiled. "I don't minds, do you?"

JJ shook her head. "Of course not."

"Good." Emily said as she chuckled.

"Can I shower first?" JJ asked.

"Yeah, of course, go ahead." Emily said, not minding at all.

"Thanks." JJ thanked her as she left for the bathroom, taking everything she needed.

Emily took off her jacket and sat down on the bed.

She turned on the TV and just waited for JJ to get out of the bathroom.

When she noticed JJ was taking way too long, she knocked on the door.

"JJ, are you okay in there?" She asked through the door.

"Yeah, I'm fine, I just lost track of time. I'll be right out." JJ responded, her voice a little weird, like she'd been crying.

Emily was worried, but didn't say anything. She just went back to the bed and tried to watch TV. She just couldn't focus. All she thought about was JJ, and what was wrong with her, why woulld she think Emily would leave if she told her what was wrong.

She was brought out of her thoughts by JJ opening the bathroom door. A lot of steam came out of the bathroom frowned and looked at JJ's eyes. They were red.

"Jay, have you been crying?" Emily asked.

"No. No, of course not, why would you think that?" JJ asked, chuckling, trying to play it cool, but it wasn't working with Emily.

"JJ, your eyes are red, like you've been crying." Emily said, stating the facts.

"What? Oh no, I just got a little soap in my eyes, that's all." JJ said, trying to pass it off as just that.

"Of course you did." Emily said, but didn't push any further.

"I'm going to go take a shower." Emily said, sidestepping JJ to go to the bathroom.

JJ sighed, but couldn't really blame Emily, she was the reason Emily was mad after all.

'You brought this on yourself so shut up, whiny baby.' JJ's mind told her.

JJ couldn't hold the tears in anymore, she laid down as she got under the covers and cried herself to sleep while Emily was in the shower.

Why did life have to be so hard? Why couldn't she do anything right? She always had a way of messing everything up. Maybe she didn't deserve Emily, Emily didn't deserve everything she was putting her through.


	10. Chapter 10

When Emily came out of the bathroom, she noticed that JJ was sleeping.

She sighed as she laid down beside her, stroking her hair.

"What are you hiding, sweetheart?" She asked.

JJ suddenly woke up slowly.

"Em?" She asked.

"I'm right here, sweetie." Emily responded.

"I'm sorry." She said.

"It's okay. You don't have to be sorry." Emily responded, honestly.

"Are you mad?" JJ asked, sounding more like a five year old child. Her voice held something that Emily could only identify as fear.

"JJ, it's okay. I'm not mad. I promise." Emily immediately assured her.

JJ nodded and gulped.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." JJ said, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"It's okay. Shhh. It's going to be okay." Emily said as she took JJ into her arms, stroking her hair.

"No it's not. If I tell you, then you'll never look at me the same again." JJ said as she cried in Emily's arms.

"JJ, I'm not leaving you." Emily insisted.

"Yes you will once you know." JJ insisted too.

"Whatever it is, JJ, I'll be right here by your side, helping you through whatever it is that's eating you up inside." Emily said.

JJ hiccuped as she cried.

When she calmed down she looked at Emily.

"You don't deserve any of this, just can't help it. I'm so scared of losing you." JJ admitted.

"You won't lose me, no matter what you tell me." Emily said.

JJ turned and buried her face into Emily's neck.

"Goodnight, Em. I love you." JJ said, her voice a little muffled.

"Goodnight, baby. I love you too." Emily responded as she held onto JJ.

Emily closed her eyes as she felt JJ's breathing slow down. She knew she was asleep. She wished that she could take all the pain away.

She would get JJ to trust her, one way or the other. She would prove to her that she won't leave her no matter what.

And that was Emily's last thought, before sleep consumed her.

The next morning, JJ woke up to see that Emily was stroking her hair.

"Morning." JJ said with a smile.

"Good morning, beautiful." Emily said with a smile, matching JJ's.

"How did you sleep?" JJ asked.

"Okay, how about you?" Emily asked.

"Okay, too." JJ responded.

Emily bent her neck and gave JJ a sweet kiss.

JJ looked into her eyes when they pulled apart.

"It's not that I don't trust you Emily." JJ stated and Emily knew she was referring to last night.

"I know." Emily said.

"I want to tell you." JJ said.

"You will. When you're ready." Emily said.

Emily had spent the night thinking about things.

She realized that she couldn't force JJ to tell her. She would give JJ her space and JJ would come to her whenever she's ready.

JJ looked at her and smiled.

"Thanks."

"For what?" Emily asked.

"For being patient. You don't deserve any of this and I am so sorry that I'm putting you through all of it, but I never told anyone about what's affecting me and I just need a little time." JJ said as she averted her eyes.

"Hey, I told you. You'll tell me when you're ready. I can wait." Emily said sincerely.

JJ just smiled at her, appreciation in her eyes.

Emily smiled back. If she waited this long for JJ to become hers, she could wait for JJ to open up to her.


	11. Chapter 11

Emily got up and turned to JJ.

"Can I get the shower first?" She asked JJ.

"Yes, of course." JJ responded.

Emily nodded her thanks and headed for the bathroom with her supplies.

JJ turned on the TV to see what was going on.

As she surfed through the channels, she couldn't find anything interesting. She changed the channel once again and finally settled on a crime TV show. She laughed to herself as she thought.

'This isn't anywhere near reality.'

She continued to watch it as Emily showered.

Finally Emily came out and JJ went in.

Emily searched through the channels, and when she found nothing interesting, she settled on the TV show that JJ was previously watching.

She waited until JJ come out to order room service.

Finally, JJ came out just as the show was ending.

"Hey, JJ?" Emily asked.

"Yeah?" JJ responded as she walked over to the bed.

"What do you want to eat?" Emily asked.

"I don't know. I think a muffin will do." JJ said.

"Alright, I think I'll have the same thing. I'll order room service." Emily said.

JJ nodded as she towel dried her hair.

They ordered room service and at the muffins along with some orange juice they had ordered too.

They grabbed their stuff and headed to the car to go join the others at the precinct.

JJ was awfully quiet, but Emily let her have her space. She didn't push for information.

On the way to the precinct, they stopped for coffee at a cafe.

"You want to stay here or come with me?" Emily asked.

"I'll stay here." JJ said as she reached for her pocket to take out some cash.

"Don't worry, Jay. I got it covered." Emily said as she went to go get coffee.

'God why is it taking so much time to get coffee?' Emily thought to herself.

Finally it was her turn. She ordered and waited for them to make it. Finally, she had the coffee in her hands.

"Thank you." She told the woman as she left the cafe to get into the car.

"JJ? Jayje?" Emily called out as she realized JJ wasn't in the car.

"Where the hell is she?" Emily asked herself as she looked for JJ.

When she couldn't find her, she put the coffee in the car and immediately dialed JJ's number.

Voice Mail.

'Oh God. This isn't happening.' She thought to herself as she dialed Hotch's number.

"Hotch, JJ is missing"


	12. Chapter 12

As soon as Hotch hung up with Emily, he rounded the team up in the conference room.

"Hotch, where's JJ and Emily? Weren't they supposed to be here by now?" Morgan asked.

"Morgan, Emily is on her way. JJ is missing." Hotch explained.

"What?!" Was everybody's response at the same time.

"I think our killer may have her. He abducted her from a cafe which fits his MO. He always abducts his victims from public places. She also has blonde hair and blue eyes." Hotch said.

"This is not good. How is Emily holding up?" Reid asked.

"I don't know. I barely talked to her, she said she would be here shortly." Just as soon as Hotch said that, Emily ran through the door.

"Hotch, we have to do something! JJ is in the hands of a rapist and killer! We have to get her back unharmed!" Emily said all in one breath.

"Emily, calm down. We'll get her back." Hotch said.

"Yeah? Before or after that freak kills her?" Emily asked, her voice breaking.

Hotch didn't know what to say t that, but he knew he'd try his damn best to get her back alive, no matter what it took.

"Emily, why don't you have a seat?" Rossi suggested.

"I don't think a seat is what I need right now, when my girlfriend is out there in the hands of a serial killer!" Emily said.

"Emily, I need your head in this, or I will have to take you off the case." Hotch said.

That seemed to calm Emily down.

"Right, okay. Where do we start?" Emily asked calmly.

"We start with the last victims. We know they were all abducted from public places. Get Garcia on the phone, Morgan." Rossi said.

Morgan nodded and called Garcia, putting her on speaker.

"You're on speaker, Garcia." Morgan said.

"Garcia, we need your help." Hotch said through the phone.

"Anything my little furry crime fighters." Garcia said in her usual chirpy voice.

"Garcia, I need to tell you something. It's about JJ." Morgan said.

"What about her?" Garcia asked, her tone getting worried.

"She's missing." Morgan said and there was only silence on the other end.

"Garcia?" Morgan asked.

"Why? Who has her?" Garcia asked after a minute.

"We think it's our killer, but we're not sure yet." Morgan said, but he was actually kind of lying. He was sure it was their killer.

"You're going to get her back and nothing is going to happen to her, right?" Garcia asked.

"We're going to try our best." Hotch said after Morgan couldn't respond.

"What do you need me to do?" Garcia asked.

"I need you to cross reference all of the victims and see if you come up with something they have in common." Hotch said.

"Okay. I'll call you back when I have something." Garcia said, hanging up.

"Now what?" Emily asked.

"We profile our guy." Morgan said.

After they had worked a little on the profile, Garcia finally called.

"What do you have for us, Garcia?" Hotch asked.

"They all went to the same gym except for JJ." Garcia said.

"Could be that JJ was just in the middle of the investigation and since she was his type he figured, why not?" Morgan suggested.

"Alright, give me the name of the gym." Hotch requested.

Garcia gave them the name of the gym and they drove there.

They requested the names of the members of the gym and went back to the precinct.

"Garcia I need you to cross reference..." Morgan's voice stopped suddenly as he stared at the paper wide-eyed.

"What is it Morgan?" Hotch asked.

"There's a Josh Jareau here." Morgan said.

"Guys, he was arrested for domestic violence and rape when JJ was 12, but was released on a technicality. He's her father." Garcia said.

"Oh My God!" Emily said.

"Garcia do you have an address?" Hotch asked.

"Yes I do." Garcia said.


	13. Chapter 13

Morgan kicked the door in as they all entered the house, their guns drawn.

"Clear!"

"Clear!"

"Clear!"

"Clear!"

"Clear!"

They each shouted from the respective rooms they were in.

After they had cleared the entire first floor, they noticed a door.

Morgan went ahead of them as he turned the door knob. He opened it and stepped to the side.

Emily was the first to enter.

There was a flight of stairs leading down to some sort of basement.

Emily spotted JJ almost immediately after she had descended the stairs.

"Josh Jareau! FBI! Hands up where I can see them." Emily shouted at the man.

The man turned around as he zipped his fly.

"You son of a bitch!" Emily shouted as she noticed him zip his pants.

"Emily! Don't! Please, he doesn't have a gun!" Morgan shouted.

Emily was ready to pull the trigger, her finger tight around it.

She seriously thought about shooting the bastard, but looked at JJ and immediately thought twice about it. Her biggest priority was getting to JJ.

She holstered her gun and went over to JJ as Morgan went to arrest JJ's father.

Emily knelt down by the bed where JJ was laying, tied up.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked JJ.

JJ just nodded, tears falling from her eyes.

"I'm going to untie you, okay?" Emily asked.

JJ nodded as Emily went to untie her.

There was no telling what that bastard did to JJ. Emily couldn't tell for sure if something happened.

After Emily had finished untying JJ, she immediately threw herself into Emily's arms, crying.

"It's okay. It's going to be okay." Emily assured as she rubbed JJ's back and ran her fingers through her hair.

Emily wanted JJ to go to the hospital, but JJ immediately said no.

"JJ, please you have to get checked out." Emily pleaded.

"No, I just want to go home, please, Em. Please." JJ pleaded with Emily.

"Okay. Fine, but you will go to my house with me and you'll stay the night, okay? Don't worry, I'll sleep on the couch if you want." Emily assured her.

"Fine then, but you don't sleep on the couch, we can both stay on the bed." JJ said.

"Okay, that's fine as long as your comfortable." Emily said.

JJ nodded and Emily went to Hotch to ask him if they could have the rest of the day off.

Hotch immediately said yes and told Emily to take good care of JJ.

Emily nodded and went to the SUV, where JJ was already waiting.

Emily got in the car and noticed JJ was staring out the window.

She sighed but didn't say anything. She simply turned the key and started driving.

When they got home, Emily parked the car in the drive and they both got out.

Emily opened the door and let JJ and herself in.

Emily went to get some comfortable clothes for them to change into.

As they changed, Emily noticed some bruises forming on JJ's thighs. She felt sick to her stomach, she felt like she was going to puke any second.

When they were dressed, Emily sat on the couch and patted the seat next to her and motioned for JJ to lay down.

JJ looked at her and laid down with her head in Emily's lap.

"Want to talk about it?" Was all Emily said.

JJ's eyes started to form tears as they fell.

Emily just ran her fingers through JJ's hair, as some sort of comfort.

And it was comforting for JJ, it let her know that Emily was there, but the question was, would she be there after she told her?

JJ locked eyes with Emily.

"I know you'll leave me after I tell you." JJ said.

"I won't, I promise, honey. I promise." Emily promised.

"Yes you will." JJ said.

"I won't JJ, I'll bet my life on it that I will not leave you no matter what you tell me. I will be here for you no matter what." Emily assured.

"I...he...he..."

 **A/N: Ha, curious? Okay, that was mean but I promise you the next chapter tomorrow.**


	14. Chapter 14

"What did he do, Jay? Talk to me. I swear I won't leave you." Emily said.

"He t-touched me." JJ cried as she turned her head, burying it in Emily's stomach.

"Look at me, Jayje. Please look at me." Emily said.

JJ unburied her face and looked into Emily's eyes. There, she found anger.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I didn't want it, I swear!" JJ cried as she got up.

"JJ! Jayje, calm down. I know you didn't want it. It's that bastard. I should have killed him when I had the chance." Emily said.

JJ calmed down a little.

"You're not mad at me?" JJ asked.

"Of course not sweetheart." Emily said as she went over to JJ and hugged her tightly.

JJ hugged her back, crying.

"It's not your fault." Emily assured.

"Yes it is! If I hadn't told..." She trailed off.

"If you hadn't told what? What are you talking about?" Emily asked, clearly confused.

JJ just shook her head crying harder.

"Shh, it's okay. You don't have to tell me, it's okay. Let's just go to bed, okay?" Emily suggested, not wanting to push JJ too far.

Emily felt JJ nod against her.

Emily took JJ's hand in her own and led them to the bedroom.

They got in to bed and pulled the covers over themselves.

JJ was calming down by now.

Emily looked her in the eyes and leaned forward, catching JJ's lips in her own.

She didn't know if it was a good idea or if JJ would freak out, but right now, it was the only way she could assure JJ that she wouldn't leave.

"I love you and I promise you I will not leave." Emily assured.

She was grateful that JJ didn't freak out at Emily kissing her, but instead kissed her back.

"Emily, he didn't rape me this time. He just touched me and made me do some things to him. But you guys came in and he didn't have time to...you know." JJ said, but the only part that seemed to catch Emily's ears the most was 'this time'.

'This Time'

Those words seemed to ring in Emily's ears as she had a sickening feeling.

"JJ, honey. What do you mean by this time?" Emily asked, her voice low as only one thing crossed her mind.

'Please tell me it's not true. Please, God, tell me I'm wrong.' Emily thought to herself.

JJ swallowed and looked into Emily's eyes.

"Promise you won't leave if I tell you?" JJ asked, sounding more like a little child.

"I promise, baby. Tell me." Emily said as tears began to sting her eyes.

Emily wiped a tear that fell down JJ's face.

"It started when I was 5. He would come into my room at night and do things to me." JJ started.

A tear fell down Emily's cheek as JJ just confirmed her fears.

"Almost every night he would come into my room and hurt me. After a while I just kind of got used to it, but then he started doing it from behind, if you get what I mean." JJ said looking down as she blushed.

"Oh God." Emily felt like she was going to be sick. She should've just killed the bastard.

"It hurt so bad, I just started praying to God, for him to just kill me. No more pain." JJ continued.

Emily's second tear fell as she listened to the horrors her girlfriend went to.

"But he didn't, it just continued on and on. When I was 16 I finally told my mom. She didn't believe me. She didn't care. I held on for two more years. When I turned 18, I finally went off to college and never had to see that bastard again until now." JJ said as a few more tears slid down.

Emily held JJ tighter.

"I promise you, you will never have to endure anything like that again as long as I'm alive, understand?" Emily asked as she looked into those pain-filled blue eyes.

JJ looked at Emily and reached up to kiss Emily's lips.

The kiss was so sweet, filled with care, compassion, promise and love.

"I wish you hadn't gone through that as a little girl." Emily said as she caressed JJ's cheek with her thumb.

"Me too, but it happened and it made me who I am." JJ said.

"Wait, is that why you seemed so scared and nervous when we went to the restaurant?" Emily asked.

JJ nodded.

"I was so scared you would want sex and I didn't think I would be able to give it to you. I'm so scared that I'll remember him instead of you. I don't want to relate you to him." JJ said.

"I'm nothing like him. I would never hurt you." Emily said.

"I know." JJ said as she kissed Emily.

"I love you." Emily said.

"I love you too." JJ said with a smile.

 **A/N: Next chapter will be a love making scene, so if you don't like that, then for you, the story stops here. :)**


	15. Chapter 15

**WARNING: LOVE MAKING SCENE! IF YOU DON'T LIKE THIS KIND OF THING THEN THE STORY ENDS AT THE PREVIOUS CHAPTER.**

A few months passed and they found themselves in Emily's house.

They had spent the time sleeping at each other's houses.

Emily sat down on the couch, right next to JJ.

"JJ, I need to ask you something, but I don't want to push you into anything, okay? If you think it's a bad idea, just tell me it's a bad idea, okay?" Emily asked.

JJ nodded and sat back, looking at Emily expectantly.

"Would you like...would you like to move in with me?" Emily asked, nervously.

"I mean, you don't have to, if you think it's a bad idea." Emily said immediately.

"Of course, I would." JJ said with a smile.

"Em, I feel safe when I'm with you. I love just being able to be around you." JJ said, still smiling.

Emily smiled back as she kissed JJ's lips.

JJ kissed her deeper.

Emily pulled her on top of her but then thought twice about what she was doing and pulled back.

"JJ, I don't think this is a good idea." Emily said.

"Em, I don't want him to ruin this for us. I'm ready. I trust you. Make love to me, Em." JJ said, looking straight into Emily's eyes.

Emily looked into those blue eyes and found nothing but trust in them.

"Okay. But if we're going to do this, it has to be right." Emily said, motioning for JJ to get off her.

JJ complied and stood up as Emily led them to the bedroom.

When they got there, Emily carefully pushed JJ down on the bed, and hovered over her as she looked straight into those beautiful eyes.

"Jay, listen to me carefully. If you want me to stop, you tell me and I will stop immediately. I will not think any less of you if you do, understood?" Emily asked, maintaining eye contact.

JJ nodded.

"Promise?" Emily asked.

"I promise." JJ said.

Emily held eye contact for a few seconds longer as she leaned over and kissed JJ's lips.

She broke off the kiss and started kissing down her neck, slowly, lingering a little on her pulse point.

She then looked JJ in the eye as she started unbuttoning her shirt.

She held eyes contact as JJ lifted her body so that Emily could remove the shirt.

JJ turned them around so that she was on top, straddling Emily.

She then proceeded to remove Emily's shirt, leaving them both in just a bra and pants.

Emily slowly reached for JJ's pants, slowly popping the button, holding eye contact.

JJ moved so that it would be easier to remove the pants and slid them down her legs as Emily did the same.

Emily got on top of JJ, once again changing their positions, both in just their bra and panties.

She started kissing from her lips down her neck, all the way to her stomach and then up again.

When she reached JJ's lips again, she looked into her eyes again as she spoke her next words.

"Tonight is about you." Emily said.

JJ was about to say something, but Emily put a finger to her lips.

"Shh, tonight I want to show you that this isn't bout violence, it's about love." Emily said as she trailed her hand, slowly, down JJ's body, stopping on her stomach.

"You sure?" Emily said.

JJ just nodded, confirming.

"Okay." Emily whispered.

She ran her hands up and down JJ's body as she undid JJ's bra.

She gave attention to both of JJ's nipples, earning a few gasps and moans.

She slowly made her way, kissing JJ's body all the way down to her panties, she played with them a little, looking at JJ for permission.

JJ nodded and Emily slowly slid them down JJ's legs, removing them.

She kissed JJ's stomach again, moving down.

She looked into JJ's eyes once again, earning her a smile and a nod.

She slowly started moving her tongue against JJ's clit, moving in circles.

She slowly entered JJ with one finger, adding another one a few moments later, while she continued to make circular motions with her tongue.

She continued her motions, until JJ moaned loudly.

"Oh God, I'm coming." JJ said.

Emily continued her movements until JJ's body started to spasm.

Emily moved up so that she was laid down next to JJ.

"That was amazing." JJ said, breathlessly as she came down from her high.

"See? No violence, just love." Emily said in a whisper.

JJ looked at her, tears in her eyes.

"I love you Emily. I love you so much." JJ said as she turned into Emily.

Emily smiled as she pulled the covers over them.

Tonight was about JJ she could wait, she was just happy to show JJ what she showed her tonight.

"I love you too, Jay." She said, kissing JJ's forehead, holding her as they both fell asleep.

 **The End.**


End file.
